Recently, I’ve been experiencing what I would label depression. It’s been really uncomfortable and I noticed other emotions like powerlessness, despair, and hopelessness. As experienced as I am with navigating my thoughts and emotions, this sense of depression had me entertaining thoughts such as, “what’s wrong with me, I should be doing better than this, how come I can’t figure out why I’m feeling this way” etc, etc., etc.
Today I met with a friend of mine who is an EFT/Tapping practitioner and as we talked and tapped, I uncovered some experiences that were “trapped” underneath. I told him about a few interactions I’ve had over the past couple weeks with people, some even strangers, that had me feeling:
Judged
Rejected
Unworthy
Turns out the depression was a cover or secondary emotion to the other feelings that I didn’t acknowledge and process. When I was able to name, process, and tap through the specific events that led to the primary emotions (judged, rejected, unworthy) my depression evaporated.
Here are a few other secondary emotions:
Anger, Shame, Jealousy
Anger, for example, is often a coverup for fear. Once you notice, understand, and process the fear you can learn about yourself and possibly make important changes.
So, did you believe your anger? Did you strike out? Did you even feel hatred? This is where things can lead to when you believe your emotions.
Now, you might be thinking, “Does that mean I believe my fear?”. Well, fear is the messenger and you can learn from it and take necessary action. Notice though, that a secondary emotion is not the true primary emotion from which we can learn.
Here is a link that you might find helpful to discover primary and secondary emotions:
Feelings Wheel (a pdf file)